Divorce

Power is not control, but the ability to influence.

Once you fire a cannon, the ball will still go in the same direction that it was fired. This is true of our relationships too. I mentioned in an earlier post that the habits you establish in a relationship in the dating and courting stages will be maintained and amplified in a marriage.

24% of American will be divorced in their lifetime and of those that are remarried, 62 % will be divorced again. These percentages were surprising to me. But, as I learned a little bit more, it made more sense. Within those couple who are remarrying, they usually are bringing other people into the relationship with them. They likely have children. This adds a whole new dynamic to a new relationship. Relationships take time to build and strengthen. When you are blending multiple lives together, it would make sense that not all of those would be successful simply because of the mass amounts of stress.

Those who marry in their teen years are more likely to be divorced. However, this is not as true for those who attend some sort of weekly religious service.

Cohabiting is one of those things that people think is a great idea. Let me clarify, when I say "cohabiting" I mean living with a sexual partner, I do not mean simply living under the same roof with a person. In the 1970's cohabiting was something that was being strongly advocated by social scientists as something that would help drive down the increasing divorce rates. Unfortunately, they didn't know at the time that cohabitation would increase the percentage of divorced couples once they did actually get married.

Why would cohabiting lead to higher divorce rates? You would think it would be a good idea because it allows the couple to test out what marriage would be like. But, it actually hinders the progress of marriage. It allows people to live their lives parallel to one another rather than combing them.

What I found surprising was the fact that women are significantly more likely to file for divorce than a man is. They are usually dissatisfied and have reached the point where they feel they most take a drastic step or they simply are tired of trying.  However, when a man files for divorce, it is usually because he already has another relationship going on. Along with this, it makes sense that those couples who are most likely to be divorced are same gender female couples.